JAMEY: Hello, I
am Jamey, the host of this show. In Kirby’s Super Survivor, the
eight chosen contestants (Kirby, Waddle Dee, Ribbon, Adeliene,
King Dedede, Meta Knight, Chef Kawasaki, and Tuff) will stay at
my mansion, trying to live with each other day after day (They
are not allowed to leave either). However, after every episode,
two contestants will be chosen and be placed in a poll where
you, the viewers, shall vote who will be kicked off. The last
one standing will be the Super Survivor. And now, without
further ado…
Our eight contestants stand outside the mansion, waiting for
Jamey to arrive.
DEDEDE: We could’ve busted down this door hours ago! Where is
this Jamey guy!?
The giant mansion doors fly open, revealing our host.
EVERYONE BUT KIRBY AND WADDLE DEE: Oh.
KIRBY: Byo!
The contestants walk inside to a well-furnished mansion, like
the one in “The Beverly Hillbillies.” :)
RIBBON: Wow?! Is this really where we’re staying?!
ADELEINE: I wouldn’t mind living here forever…
Kirby and Waddle Dee start jumping up and down in excitement.
KAWASAKI: There’s even a world class kitchen.
META KNIGHT: It’s all right…
DEDEDE: Man, what a dump!
TUFF: You’re a dump!
JAMEY: Knock it off, you two. Now, get yourself acquainted
with this place. You may or may not be trapped here for a long
time.
ADELEINE: How intriguing…
JAMEY: I’ll be back in about an hour. For now, unpack your
bags and do what you must. I have some business to take care
of.
Jamey walks into a nearby bathroom.
EVERYONE: …
So for the last hour, each of them started to claim rooms,
most of the time with Kirby eating someone.
RIBBON: Kirby, you barbarian!
But in the end, Kirby got rights to a tree house in the
backyard, Meta Knight won the basement, and King Dedede got the
attic. Everyone else got standard rooms on the other floors.
TUFF: I don’t feel safe knowing someone as heavy as Dedede is
sleeping above me…
But nonetheless, one full hour passed by with Jamey on the
toilet.
Finally, the toilet flushes in the bathroom Jamey is in and our
sickened host walks out.
JAMEY: Man…what is in those school burritos…
The contestants instantly appear in front of Jamey to find out
what immunity mini-game will be hosted today.
JAMEY: Whoa! Don’t do that to me!
EVERYONE BUT KIRBY AND WADDLE DEE: Whoops.
KIRBY: Byo!
JAMEY: For today, we will have what will be the most intense of
the mini-games, which will have you so exasperated, you’ll
collapse on the floor by the end of today…
KAWASAKI: For some reason, I don’t like the sound of this…
JAMEY: It’s…the
drawing the lots.
Everyone falls down on the floor from a stupid shock.
JAMEY: See! I told you so!
META KNIGHT: What a moron…
One after another, each of them grabbed a small piece of
paper wrapped in a thick black construction paper from a
cardboard box.
JAMEY: Now, open your lots. Whoever has a red one shall
advance to the next round.
They each rip their lots open. Only Adeleine, Kirby, Tuff, and
Waddle Dee have red ones.
DEDEDE: No fair! You must’ve rigged these things!
JAMEY: You know, I have the right to kick you out of my mansion
at any time I wish! Isn’t that fun?
DEDEDE: Grrr…
JAMEY: Now, for the four that advanced. Each of you will go
into our next test of immense skill!
EVERYONE: ???
JAMEY: Thumb wars!
Once again, everyone falls backwards from a stupid shock.
TUFF: Who’s making these up, anyway?!
JAMEY: (sarcastically) Well it can’t POSSIBLY be your host…
RIBBON: Um, Jamey? We have a problem with two of our
contestants…
JAMEY: What is it, Ribbon?
RIBBON: Well Kirby and Waddle Dee…they…
META KNIGHT: They don’t have thumbs, you moron…
JAMEY: Oh, well…isn’t that a problem. You know what this
means. Kirby and Waddle Dee are both disqualified!
KIRBY: Byo…
Since he has no mouth, Waddle Dee puts on the saddest
_expression he can make.
JAMEY: Only Tuff and Adeleine will participate then.
Tuff and Adeliene approach each other. They glare at each
other’s eyes as they hold hands and stick their thumbs up.
Ribbon giggles.
RIBBON: (Thinking) How sweet… :)
JAMEY: Begin!
Immediately, Tuff goes on the offensive and tries to mash to
Adeleine’s thumb from the start.
Adeleine dodges to the side while Tuff tries to mash her down
again.
Adeleine takes this opportunity and holds down Tuff’s thumb
while he’s still down.
JAMEY: I better start the count! 1…2…3!
ADELEINE: Hehehe…I’m the Popstar thumb war champion of 1993!
Tuff glares at Adeleine, trying to get away from her grasp.
JAMEY: 6…7!
Tuff finally thinks up a better strategy.
TUFF: Wow…your eyes have a little bit of blue to them!
Adeleine blushes.
ADELEINE: Well I am adorable…
Tuff escapes from Adeliene barely before the countdown was over
and is now pressing down her instead.
JAMEY: Whoa! 1…2…3…4!
ADELEINE: Why you…you tricked me!
TUFF: Yyyup!
JAMEY: 6…7…8!
Adeleine fights Tuff’s grasp with all her might, but it’s no
good.
JAMEY: 9…10! Tuff is the winner!
They let go of their hands. Tuff starts hopping around the
room.
TUFF: Ah, I knew it. No one can beat me!
ADELEINE: Grr…
JAMEY: With that, Tuff will have immunity this round and will
not be voted off. I’ll now be back in a few hours. By then, be
ready to pick the two contestants you want to put on the poll.
JAMEY: I’m back! I hope you’re ready to give someone the boot
now!
DEDEDE: Whoa! How did 6 hours go by so fast?
JAMEY: This is how we determine who’ll be on the poll. Each of
you will write down two people’s names on a sheet of paper and
you’ll turn it into me. These are the two people you want to
vote off. Remember, Tuff can’t be one of the names you’ll write
down due to his win today.
Waddle Dee writes down King Dedede for being so mean and Kirby
for eating his parents.
Kirby writes down Meta Knight and King Dedede for being so mean
to him in the past.
Meta Knight writes down Chef Kawasaki for not doing much for the
whole episode and Ribbon for being so annoying.
META KNIGHT: Reminds me of Navi from a certain Zelda game…
They each turn in their papers.
JAMEY: The two names I received most of are King Dedede and
Meta Knight. It is now up to you, the viewers, to choose who
will be voted off.
NOTE TO
VIEWERS: Since this is a story I wrote a while back, the polls
don’t exist anymore. Yeah, you can’t vote on what doesn’t exist
;) I did, however, collect results from when it did exist
though.
