Ask Guru Gobbo #97

1) There are seven abilities and three additional functions of each for a grand total simple math product of twenty-eight.

2) Wikipedia is, for the most part, flawed and muddled when it comes to Kirby. In fact, Rainbow Resort's forum has an entire stickied topic just chronicling all of their flubs when it comes to the puff ball. Such a broad basis information source should only serve the purpose of general information and basic facts, not all of the in depth details it tries to fill itself with.

1) If you look, while the castle is falling to ruin, only the central, domed mass is crumbling. There's only a few seconds of this, but nothing else is shown collapsing. The outer structures still stand and are unfazed by the crooked crooning. Also, since the castle was reshaped into an amusement park, a lot of it would have had to been rebuilt or at least restructured to resume its original function. Or, it's a cartoon.

2) ... Yes. He went on and destroyed them later. Kirby is pure evil.

3) They are more like dogs, floating dogs, and just sleep where they might, probably suspended in the air in Tiff's room or the what not.

0) Not an A student in math, I see. If I was ten in '93, and it's only been fifteen years, barring any temporal anomalies, three more years wouldn't sneak up in there and jump me.

1) The Squeakers can just be looked at as Daroach's Waddle Dee. It's just a plentiful minion type. Doc, in fact, is one of them, just white colored with glasses and a mustache. They don't need to be artificial to be so plentiful. There is a ton of Broom Hatters and no one is asking questions.

2) Yes, Kine can be used outside of the water. He moves slow and handles poorly when out of his element, and this is why the fish is a crucial part of getting a lot of Rainbow Drops or Heart Stars when there is no water around. They like to stick it to ya.

3) I'm certain it wasn't done "randomly". In fact, nothing good ever comes from "random" thoughts. It was a well formulated decision based on past trends and the direction the character was heading. He was already rather dark, especially in Revenge of Meta Knight, and membranous wings are the flight method of choice for anyone who isn't angelic.

4) I ... never... expected... to see... this... twice. At least you acknowledged that he was already flying.

1) It isn't necessarily bootleg. Only the American cover had the angry eyebrows added on. You could have just purchased an international version or British release. Although, I believe it was called "Mouse Attack" then.

2) I do not spell names. They are automatically supplied to me in a block of HTML code that I just copy. Easy as that. I sometimes skip over even looking at them.

Well sir, there's these link things on the left of the main page, grouped by category. Clearly labeled is a segment "Games" that then goes on to list all of the Kirby titles by their system released under. As for Kirby's Wii (formerly Game Cube) title, there's no page as there's no information to put on one. It's in production limbo~! There're bits and pieces scattered across the site, but these nuggets are nothing that couldn't be gotten from watching the official trailer, now years old. See the trailer's video here.

1) Monarchies commonly have a prime minister. Look at England. The crown is, in truth, just a figure head. When they know enough to know that they don't know how to run a country, they delegate out the responsibility. And, really, does King Dedede strike you as the wise ruler type?

2) No. They are not. The pair are just sworn to loyalty to Meta Knight since he saved their life. They aren't Star Warriors. Out of the main cast, only Kirby and Meta Knight are among those elite few.

3) Meta Knight does not have Spanish heritage as he's not from the planet Earth. Only human beings and certain dishes can be called Spanish. Meta Knight is a galactic warrior who has never heard of Spain, nor has anyone he's ever known.

4) While Kabu is traditionally said to be made out of stone, the animated series gives him a textured surface that looks more like a chunk of wood. However, even there, they say that it is comprised of stone, despite the appearance.

1) It was all part of a bad guy relocation initiative to get all the thugs and evil doers off of Pop Star. Or, it's a game, and they wanted to re-use the same bosses.

2) Nope, don't. It sure does look neat, tho'.

3) 'Fraid not. They die like the dickens. It's been told in the mangas how Wapod, the ghostly Dee from Dream Land 3, is the spirit of the eaten an' beaten back for revenge. Them be some dead baddies. Cutely dead~!

4) You aren't familiar with ruling powers, are you? It's a very common motif to have a fat, lazy, more-bad-than-good king sitting on the throne. It's, like, the number two bad guy in folklore after an evil wizard. Kings didn't do much a lot of times. Sure, you'd have your warrior king who rode out into battle with his army, but he stayed far behind his men. Most are born into the role. All of that cushy living makes them soft and weak in body and will. Peasants would resent their ruler since they'd toil while he'd plump, so their tales demonized them. It's not like, after all, that they attended to pressing affairs all day long. They probably sat there in robes and chuckled at the court jester.

Well, there's only two -- Avalanche and Star Stacker (as Kirakira Kizzu is essentially the deluxe version of the latter). Since Avalanche isn't even really a Kirby game, and since Star Stacker is awesome, yeah, that's my winner. I'd get crazy far in Insane level Challenge mode.

Maps serve their purpose -- allowing the player to take more control in the path taken. Super Mario Bros. 3 and World had distinct effects from one level to the next that would open up paths and alternate routes that led to even more secrets. Kirby had this in Adventure/Nightmare in Dream Land, only he still platformed around a scene rather than changing to a top-down map view. Bonuses like mini-games, copy abilities, and full health were offered to the player if they wanted to deviate from the linear game play. Most Kirby games, and most games in general, don't need this. There's no point to run around on a map if nothing comes from it. If you have to get from point A to B and there isn't any C, D, or E, then the player should just be ushered along directly. I don't think there's anything wrong with this. It's just the manner of the game's play.

It would really help if you gave some trace as to where you saw this. Saying the Dream Land section doesn't really narrow it down. Providing the URL is best. From what I can see, scanning through all the pages (although not fine tooth combing since I don't know exactly where to put focus), I see nothing. I can only suspect that you somehow wandered out of the Dream Land part and into the Adventure part otherwise.

1) Warp Stars are, pretty much, Warp Stars. They have variable speeds and can cruise quickly or blast off with a sudden burst.

2) No. They are about as alive as the magic carpet in Disney's Aladdin. They are animated, they react to situations, but they are mostly just empowered ... stars. It's like several magical items with minds of their own. They aren't essentially alive but still possess characteristics of life.

3) A Warp Star about to expire would probably start to lose its luster or blink. The one that crashed through Dedede's castle just shattered to pieces. Oh well.

4) No, they are stars. They just come from the sky. Or, I dunno, orphans' hearts. Pair them suckers up with the forbidden arts to get just about anything you want done.

5) You've... never heard of Kirby's Air Ride? Really? I mean, it was a title for the Game Cube, wide release.

Probably this week, at least come this weekend. I wanted to give the last few submissions time to be digested and rated accordingly. I also wanted to get nearly all of the submissions a picture made. I say "nearly" as there are two I purposely am glibbing over -- one on the basis that the description was junk and the other because, well, I didn't care.

Yep, in star showers~! Hyuk-yuk-yuk!

1) The Sleep ability is not pointless. It was best put in a poor Japanese translation: "It allows you to see Kirby's sleepy face." If that's not point, then why bother with anything? Oh, and in Squeak Squad it could be upgraded to heal. But, mostly, sleepy face.

2) You get higher ratings by doing things better. Generally, whatever you are doing now, don't repeat. Repeating the same actions will lead to the same result -- failure. So, switch it up. If you went left before, go right. Also, explore options fully.

1) Ooo, Ceekay just laid down the burn.

2) This doesn't surprise me. It should, but I've been about shocked out. This is a common view when people, by whom I mean "new gamers", not that there ever was such thing as old gamers, are introduced to a pre-existing series. People tend to be pretty self centered and only acknowledge things out in their time frame, even despite the now abundant means to easily learn about anything's distant past. The real kicker is that the title is Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards. How many games have that long winded of a title for their first game unless its some very complicated RPG? Let's take a look: Glover, Banjo Kazooie, Super Smash Bros. Games didn't mention "64" unless there was a previous non-64 title of the game. So, yes, your friends are stupid. You shouldn't be friends with people that dumb.

Wolf? I've always taken it as more of a generic mammal, mostly canine with traits of rodents such as moles and rabbits. Wolves are sleak and graceful. Gaw Gaw is stubby with fat paws primed for digging. Unless you mean the larger version, Gao Gao.

1) I don't think you mean the manga. You seem to be describing the animated series, or anime. Manga are comics; anime are animations. I agree, however, that everything is changed and stupid. That's why I don't like the animated series and compare it to the Super Mario Bros. Movie which was a far venture outside the realm of the video games. This is the same thing -- skim some basic ideas off the top and fill in the rest of the detail, which is about all of them.

2) Nightmare creates all sorts of minions and powerful creatures with abilities. One of these was Kirby, which isn't that far fetched. His creations sometimes turn on him and don't obey orders, which was the case with Kirby. Really, when you think about it, he's not too different from the monsters sent out, just missing the brutal training, age, experience, and warped mind.

3) Kirby is a young child in the animated series. For reasons on why I should be allowed to punch any else who incessantly re-asks this baseless question, see Session #08. And now it goes and gets FAQ'd up in here.

4) Meta Knight's voice actor in Brawl is Jay Ward in English or Atsushi Kisaichi in the original Japanese. Yeah, I've never heard of him, either. He also does Wolf and the narrations for the Metroid parts, I guess.