Ask Guru Gobbo #126

Kirby has been having Shmup action since day one. Kaboola, Nightmare Orb, Heart of NOVA, Zero, and even 0². You forgo the traditional platforming and game play in favor of a free movement, far shooting blitz. The thing is, there's no depth behind any of these. Kirby doesn't use his abilities, he doesn't copy, and he pretty much just tears through a single boss. Could they? Yeah, it's possible, but possible doesn't mean good. Kirby gets his charm from his platforming and game play. If this were compromised to just scroll the player through an onslaught of shots and enemies, well, you'd be better off with Gradius than Kirby, now wouldn't you?

1) The magic eight ball tells me they'll avoid mixing abilities for so many reasons.

2) I tear Nightmare in Dream Land a new one. It's a repeat, and they didn't add, only subtracted, elements from it.

3) I'd think that such an enormous ability demand would bog down the player and the game makers.

4) The Dream Land 3 pastel graphics were most suiting to how Kirby games should be.

5) I've only stumbled when going between Kirby games. Some you just hit up to inflate while others jump can do it. Dashing doesn't work in Dream Land 2. That first one alone is enough to cost a good number of lives.

6) The loss of Tilt 'n' Tumble 2 is still a mystery, but I've aired my analysis, which still doesn't clear up much on the matter.

7) It's already been made known that Sora will do nothing with Kirby. Sakurai was never really happy with the business philosophy of "make one then another, money-money!" He made a good game and was proud of it, and then they wanted a sequal, and then another, another, etc. Rather than spinning the same wheel over, he'd rather made new game babies. You can respect that. He'd rather keep integrity in his creation over a fat wallet.

Maybe you'll mention it, maybe you won't, but Kirby-4-Ever actually wrote Nintendo a physical letter about the Kirby Wii game, so they sent him a response. He scanned it and uploaded a portion of the text to the KRR Gallery, which was of course deleted since it wasn't art. Dunno why he didn't try sending it into more proper channels.

Anyway, they said that Japan had a release date, but not America. Someone there seems to think or seems to want others to think that game is comin' out.

And that date is the only thing since the beta trailer to say anything about the game. But, really, does it need anything to say its been getting worked on? The game looked finished to me years ago! It's on a list with a bunch of other games slated for release this year. I'd think, probably, towards the end of the year.

I'm fairly certain the last two can be found for purchase as a "Fright to the Finish" movie. The other ones, if they aren't at the 4Kids website (yeah, some show library they claim to have), then I guess you're out of luck. I find it kinda hard to believe that someone didn't sneak those onto YouTube, unless 4Kids is cracking down on the illegal proliferation stuff.

3) No, it is not. It's just an angel. People have raised a brow to the cherub being a Ripple Fairy priorly. Being a precursor is up for debate, but it most certainly is not from that star. The wings alone are a dead give away.

2) The white blobs abruptness is all part of its final boss psyche out. Nightmare Orb, Dark Matter in Knight form, and later Dark Matter in Real form prior to 0's first appearance; the false final foe is nothing new in the Kirby series. And even still, before those guys, you generally fought King Dedede, the alleged of the last. Even Marx just jumped out of no where with no build up and minimal foreshadowing to take the spot of ultimate evil.

1) She was a painting that sprung to life for no reason. Since she already had spontaneous vitality in her being, she could probably just spawn other things from thin air. Besides, the magical brush was used to change the world around her and rob Kirby of his parts. It wasn't necessarily essential to creating anything, just changing it.

2) That's pretty much all of him. Yeah, I know, he was always spherical, but without limbs, he couldn't really do anything outside of roll. The entire side-gimmick of the game is that the player has to guide the helpless Kirby along with the magic paintbrush since, obviously, he can't make use of it.

1) Weren't you just severely chewed out for asking this very same question that you should have been fully already aware of the answer to? Unless, of course, you mean something different than what is described in any of the several answers linked to, in which case repeating the question verbatim is certainly not going to warrant any different answer.

2) Writing a story on Rainbow Resort. That doesn't really happen, but you can have a fan fiction posted on the site. For the Fan Fiction area, there's details there about how to get your stuff submitted. Of course, since that area is in terrible disrepair with mired HTML that I shutter to think about wading through, most people just make use of the Forums to post their literary works.

1) Probably! I never really pay heed to the non-fitting parts of the site. Even if it is here, it's not really top priority and should be treated as such.

2) Now, if the Japanese one said coming soon, I'd think it'd have more warrant to Super Star Ultra. However, it was the English one that had this message, the less informed side of the Pacific. Also, Utlra was not supposed to be the next Kirby game released. This could have been a wasted anticipation for the thought soon released previously Game Cube currently Wii title. That was a long gap between Squeak Squad and Ultra for them to foreshadow, it's appearance aside.

1) You wouldn't have to be able to see the Japanese characters if all you want is the romanization of the name. Those are given in plain English at Kirbypedia for a plethora of old school enemies. That's right, folks, Kirbypedia. Just because it's not updated at the blinding speed it was in its hayday doesn't mean all that knowledge it accumulated went sour for some reason. Anyhoo, it's name comes out exactly as you predicted, Aisudoragon.

2) That sounds like an oversight. Granted, I don't now what hole this is, what it is they do, or even how the game play Air Ride works in the slightest, but there's never an intension by a design point of view of sticking the player into two obstacles at once.

3) Flying whale. Yeah, nothing that hasn't been pointed out before. They moved around the Super Star bosses from Pop Star to other worlds as well. They really just don't care about such trivialities, and, really, neither should the player. This isn't some uber realistic epic series, after all, it's Kirby. At least they tinted and slightly modified colors of the other worldly bosses in Super Star Ultra to give the illusion that it could be something new.

Fatty Whale looks to show a nice set of chompers, but I think that's baline bristles. His orca counterpart Acro has some canines, though, and what about Gobbler/Gabriel? A lot of bosses do, actually. Golem King, I'm pretty sure Wham Bam Rock/Jewel, too. Marx has a pair of fangs. I believe Batty (Amazing Mirror) has protruding points, even if they are the same color as his body. Storo has one big buck. Propeller (Dream Land 2+) grits his grinders when he flies into a rage. Then, let's not forget Skuller (Dream Land). His teeth are visible all the time. Lastly, there's the mangas. Even Waddle Dee is shown with teeth in that thing. There's teeth abound if you know where to look.

1) It's Bloppy McCakerson, aka Blopper.

2) There's plenty of updates made at the site. However, the bulk of them are not game information related, typically stuff like this Q/A section, Mailbag, or fan creation contests. It's "Classic" gaming, after all. The site is suppose to be a retro-archive of the wondrous past Kirby had. Nothing is wrong with the new games, but, hell, I don't even have the latest four systems to play any of those games. And my Super Nintendo is out of order on top of that. We're dreamers holding on to the scraps of the past. New fangled things hold no value to us! Or, me. That's my take on it. What was the question? Oh, yes, 32.

3) Were did it come from? It was just Dedede's shape made into an extra dimension. It's not like it was found under a log or anything. The model was based more upon his Dream Land 3 shape than is, up to that time, bigger headed original sprites.

I'm with ya. My place in April Fools was very well planned, outlined weeks before hand. The staff normally has a special topic for it in the boards where all is planned out. Everyone else was planning things and gags to do in the forum, which I have no problem with. That's all fine and good. Since they had that end covered, I said I'd do something at the main site. Outside of the April Fools' Mailbag with a "mysterious" guest Bagger, I also wanted to talk about a new, exciting, totally real Kirby game coming out for the Wii, Journey of Kirby Extra.

The "real game" was introduced at 11:59pm on March 31st, the minute all real April Fools' jokes are unleashed. Everyone does them at the less obvious minute before when the posting is time stamped, even Google. That's how its done. This joke, literally being "JOKE" when abbreviated, was a parody to the classic "new game coming out yay" gag that people normally pull at this time of the year. I remember years ago before Gold/Silver came out for Pokémon, that old, that this site did a totally believable mock up of new official art to new monsters. A lot of places do that. And you get totally crushed when you realize that it was posted at the fooling minute, one before midnight on April 1st.

Well, that's what this joke was supposed to be making light of. I played the fan fare loud, but then produced horribly fake "screen shots", if you could even call them that, and maintained the certainty that they were real till the end. Of course, this update was buried under a wave of other, much less involved updates by other staffers, on April 1st, which totally nullified my planned, worked on, and announced joke. And, apparently, a lot of people didn't even see that it was made thanks to the drop-down duo.

So, that was my joke. Apparently, the site had a better one in store for me -- spite.

Hardest) Extra Game on Dream Land. Sure, the other ones get tough, but you have abilities to help you through. No such luck here.

Longest) Super Star Ultra has got to be pretty long, especially considering beating the Helper to Hero with all Helpers bit.

Shortest) No contest here. Dream Land is a portable, bite-sized chunk.

Easiest) I'm just going to say Squeak Squad based on what I've heard and Tornado being totally broken.

Stupidest) Avalanche, namely since it isn't even a Kirby game at heart.

1) I wouldn't know how or if I could correct that. I mean, dang, correcting kanji? That does come off as a little bit bragging, but when it's correcting kanji, I think one is allowed.

2) *shudder* I'm not gonna be able to sleep for days! Anyhoo, the Dedede Spring has come up before. It doesn't seem to have a Star Rod in it, which would lead to all sorts of problems, so its probably just a decorative fountain. There are more springs than magical ones, after all. Like ones of Smucker's Brand Strawberry preserves!

3) The trophies have horrible fact checking. Bronto Burt is a bird, "Meta-Knight", with a hyphen, first appeared in Super Star, something screwy with how Burning and Fire were combined. They're the real nightmare in Dream Land.

4) No, it is not. Only Squeaky Bogg can have fan girls. Love him!